विवाहको पहिलो रात।

विवाहको पहिलो रात।
दुलहीको मनको ढुकढुकी बढीरहेको थियो।
दुलहा कोठामा पस्यो।
ढोका लगायो।
दुलहीको मन झन ढक्क फुल्यो।
दुलहाले पर्दा सबै बन्द गर्यो।
अनी बत्ती निभायो।
बिस्तारै खाटमा आयो अनी दुलहीको
नजिक आएर भन्यो,
"एउटा कुरा देखाँउ?" दुलहीले मुन्टो हल्लाएर हुन्छ भनी।

तिमीहरु चुरोट कहिलै खाँदैनौ

शिक्षक:-तिमीहरु मलाई कसम देओ कि तिमीहरु चुरोट कहिलै खाँदैनौ!!!
स्टुडेन्ट:-खादै नौ सर...
शिक्षक:-रक्सी कहिलै पिउदैनौ!!!
स्टुडेन्ट:-पिउद ैनौ सर...
शिक्षक:-केटीको पछि कहिले लाग्दैनौ!!!
स्टुडेन्ट:-लाग् दैनौ सर...
शिक्षक:-सबले भन देशको लागी मर्छौ!!!

Brilliant Student Answers

Answers of a Brilliant student who obtained 0%

Q. In which battle did Napoleon die?
A. His last battle.

Q. Where was the Declaration of Independence Signed?
A. At the Bottom of the Page.

Q. River Ravi flows in which state?
A. Liquid.

तिमि नुवाउदैनौ कि क्या हो

शेरे - (ले Collegeमा एउटि केटि लाई) .
..
“तिमि नुवाउदैनौ कि क्या हो ?” .
.
girl: “म त सधै नुहाउछु है, तर
तिमिले किन सोधेको ?”
..
.
.
. .
.

बिहे अघि बिहे पछि

प्रेमीका – तिमी बिहे पछि चुरोट पिउन छोड्छौ ?

प्रेमी – किन नछोड्नु अवश्य पनि छोड्छु ।

प्रेमीका – रक्सी र तास नि !

प्रेमी – त्यो पनि छोड्छु ।

प्रेमीका – बिहे अघि चाँहि के के छोड्ने विचार गरेको छौ नि !

सबभन्दा राम्रो लाग्ने फूल के हो ?

राम, श्याम र हरी बसेर गफ गरी रहेका थिए ।

एतिकै मा एकजना कुइरे आयो र उनिहरुसँग बसेर ठुलो ठुलो कुरा गर्न थाल्यो ।

त्यो कुइरेले राम लाई सोध्यो तिमिलाई सबभन्दा राम्रो लाग्ने फूल के हो ?

“गुलाफ”रामले जवाफ दियो ।

कुइरेले फुइँ लगाएर भन्यो म त त्यसले दिसा गर्दा खेरी आफ्नो चाक पुच्छु ।

श्यामले भन्यो “जस्मिन” कुइरेले फेरी भन्यो म त्यसले पनि आफ्नो चाक पुछ्ने गर्छु ।

तिमी मलाई कती माया गर्छौ

स्वास्नी : तिमी मलाई कती माया गर्छौ ?

लोग्ने : शार्जहा जती

स्वास्नी : तेसो भय म मरेपछी तिमीले पनि मेरो सम्झनामा ताजमहल बनाउछौ ??

बिहे गर्न सक्दिन

गीता : सिता अब म महेश सँग बिहे गर्न सक्दिन

सिता : किन तिमीले महेशलाई कुनै अर्कै केटी सँग देख्यौ कि ?

एक रुपैयाँ दिनुस्

भिखारी : साहब, एक रुपैयाँ दिनुस् ।

साहब : तिमीलाई लाज लाग्दैन ? सडकमा उभिएर भिख माग्नलाई ?

आज तिमीले के राम्रो काम गर्यो ?

शिक्षिका(रामलाई): भन त आज तिमीले के राम्रो काम गरेउ ?

राम : मिस हामी ४ जना मिलेर आज एउटा बुढी महिलालाई सडक पार गरायौं

शिक्षिका : ओहो यो त साह्रै रामो काम गरेउ त तिमीहरुले तर एउटा महिलालाई सडक पार गराउन ४ जना किन नि ?

चोरिको फल एकदम नराम्रो हु

शिक्षक : चोरिको फल एकदम नराम्रो हुन्छ त्यसैले कहिले पनि चोरी नगर्नु

रामले बिचमै उठेर भन्यो: तर सर हिजो मैले एउटा स्याउ चोरेर खाएको थिए त्यो त एकदम मिठो थियो त ।

मलाई त डर लाग्यो अली बिस्तारै कुदाउ न

हरि बहादुर ले एक पल्ट मोटर साईकल किनेछ ,
 तेस्पछी मदन बहादुर लाई मुक्ती नाथ घुम्न जाउ भनेछ ।
मदन बहादुर ले पनि हुन्छ भनेछ र बाटो मा यस्तो भएछ ।

मदन बहादुर :- धोका दिनेलाई के भन्नुम र खै !! ओह हरी बहादुर । मोटर साईकल कस्तो कुदाएको ???

we bother only errors

A software engineer was smoking in the bus stand.

Girl:didn't u see the warning?smoking is injurious to health.

After marriage Read It backward

Boy: At last i can Hardly wait!
Girl: Do you want me to leave?
Boy: No don"t even theink about it!
Girl: Do you love me?
Boy: Of course, always!
Girl: Have you ever cheated on me?
Boy: No, why are you asking?
Girl: Will you kiss me?
Boy: Every chance i get
Girl: Will you slap me?
Boy: Hell no, are you crazy?!
Girl: Can I trust you?

Moscow the capital of china

A girl was frantically praying in the church continously :oh God! please make Moscow the capital of china.
The priest was surpriesed and  asked: why you pray so,my child?

kya tum sex karte

doctor: kya tum sex karte huye aapne pati ka face dekh ti ho?
ladki:ha, ek bar dekha tha,o gusse mein lag rahe thhey?
doctor:o,kyun?

who wants to go to heaven?

Teacher: who wants to go to heaven?
Everybody raised their hands except one
boy!
Teacher: why?!! asks him.

Boy pokes a girl

TEACHER: who created the earth?
(Boy pokes a girl's back wit a pen)
GIRL: oh god!
TEACHER: gud girl..corect ans!
TEACHER: who was born on 25 dec?
... (Boy pokes again)
GIRL: oh jesus!
TECHER: very gud. corect ans..
TEACHER: wat did eve tell adam when they had their 17th baby?
(Boy pokes the girl's back again )

श्यामेलाई गाली गर्दै

रामेः श्यामेलाई गाली गर्दै ,
चोर, डाका, फटाहा, बलत्कारी, ज्यानमारा, राहदानी बेचुवा, अल्छी, भातमारा, सुतुवा, ट्वाँके, !

राजेश हमाल राख्नु पर्छ

A boy and girl  were married and on the day of honey moon and before having sex with her boyfriend asks,

"हाम्रो बच्चाको नाम चाइ के राख्ने ??"
... . ..
Boy wears 5 condoms and says,

'लाटा' ले 'पापा' हेरे झैँ भएँ

'कालिदास' को भाई जुत्ता बेचेर 'एडीदास' (Adidas) भो,
म मोरो केटीको चक्करमा 'देवदास' (Devdas) भए, 
कोइ फलाम बेचेर 'टाटा' (Tata) भए,
कोइ चप्पल बेचेर 'बाटा' (Bata) भए, 

PRESS'' लेखेको थियो

पुलिस र कैदि
पुलिस:- तिमी कसरी जेल पर्‍यो
कैदी :- त्यो निसा नाम कि पत्रक्स्स्र को कारण सर्
पुलिस:- के गर्या थ्योउ तिमी र ?

ड्याड मलाई बहीनि चाहियो

ठेकेदारको छोरा : ड्याड मलाई
बहीनि चाहियो
ठेकेदार : यसको लागि त नौ महिना लाग्छ बाबु ।

दुई जना झगडा गरिरहेका थिए

तीन चार जना मध्ये दुई जना झगडा गरिरहेका थिए । पहिलोले भन्दै थियो ,''एक बक्सिङ्ग हानेर तेरो ६४ वटै दाँत भुँईमा खसाली दिन्छु । ''झगडा नगरेको अर्कोले हाँस्दै प्याच भन्यो ,'''मान्छेको पनि ६४ वटा दाँत हुन्छ र ?????

नेता क देखि ज्ञ सम्म पढम

================
क =कुकुर नेता
ख=खुरापाती नेता
ग=गुंडा नेता
घ=घुसखोरी नेता
ङ= ङ्याच्च पर्ने नेता
च=चोर नेता
छ=छक्का नेता
ज=जनावर नेता
झ=झापड खाने नेता
ञ = सिंग नभएका नेता
ट=ट्वाके नेता
ठ= ठग नेता
ड=डाका नेता
ढ=ढाटुवा नेता
ण= त्रिकोण पार्टी का नेता
त=तस्करी नेता
थ=थुतुनो बिग्रेको नेता
द=दलाली नेता
ध=ध्वासे नेता

euta jadayaha tarkari kinna pasal

euta jadayaha tarkari kinna pasal ma gayacha .pasal ma sabzi wala sabzi ma pani charki raheko thiyo. 20 min jati heri sake pachi jadayaha le bhanecha-sahuji yadi mula lai hosh aayako bhaya 1kg dinus na.

सङगिनी तीन महिने सुइ

एक पल्ट लगाए पछी तिन महिना ढुक्क
फेरी सम्बिधानसभालाई तिन दलले लगाए
भारतबाट जयन्तप्रसादले ल्याइदिएको
सङगिनी तीन महिने सुइ !

सपनामा क्या राम्री केटी देख्या

बुढा : आज
मेरो सपनामा क्या राम्री केटी देख्या थेँ
भने ..कुरै नगर..कस्ती बब्बाल राम्री...

बुढी : एक्लै आकी थी होली नि??

बुढा : लौ ! तलाई कसरि थाहा भयो ?

Boss during an Interview

Boss: There are two main rules for our company to select you.

Applicant: What is it Sir?

Boss: Our second rule is Cleanliness, did you wipe your feet on the mat near the door before coming in?

Applicant: "Yes Sir"

Google is a girl or a boy ?.

Teacher : Google is a girl or a boy ?.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Rambahadur:

Girlfriend Called her Boyfriend

Girlfriend Called her Boyfriend
GF: Honey where are you ?
BF: I'm at the bank
GF: Dear, please I need 3000¤ to activate my blackberry, 5000¤ to
domy hairand 10,000 to buy a dress.

Lazy Rules

Lazy rule 1
If you drop the ice cube, just kick it under the fridge
----
Lazy rule 2:
If you have to say something more than once, its not worth the energy
----
Lazy Rule 3:
If you spill water, it will eventually dry
----
Lazy rule 4:
If its not on the first search page on Google, it doesn't exist
----
Lazy rule 5:

Three Mice

Three mice were sitting in a bar talking about how tough they were.
The first mouse slams a shot and says,"I play with mouse traps for fun. I'll run into one on purpose and as it is closing on me, I grab the bar and bench press it twenty or thirty times."And with that he slams another shot.

The second mouse slams a shot and says,"That's nothing. I take those poision tablets, cut them up and snort them just for the fun of it."

And with that he slams another shot.

Attacked by pakisthani Terroist

A Pakistani boy took admission in
an American school...
Teacher : What's your name ?
Boy : Nadir
Teacher : No, now you are in
America, your
name is Jhony from today.
Boy went home and mom asked:
How was the day Nadir?
Boy : Im an American now, call me
Jhonny.
Mom and Dad both got offended
and
beat him up.

request a raise in salary

Funniest!

I, the penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following reasons:

* I do physical labour
* I work at great depths
* I am always using my head first
* I do not get RDO's, weekends off or public holidays
* I work in a damp environment
* I don't get paid overtime or shift penalties
* I work in a dark workplace that has poor ventilation
* I work in high temperatures
* My work exposes me to contagious diseases

Response from Human Resources After assessing your request, and considering the arguments you have raised, the administration rejects your request for the following reasons:

* You do not work 8 hours straight
* You fall asleep on the job after brief work periods
* You do not always follow the orders of the management team

बाघ बिडी पिउँदै थियो

बाघ बिडी पिउँदै थियो, एउटा मुसो आयो अनि भन्यो 'बाघ दाइ छोड यो नशा, हिँड मसङ्ग , हेर जङ्गल कति राम्रो छ !
बाघ सँगै हिड्यो । केहि अगाडी हात्ती भेटियो, ऊ ड्रग्स लिदैथियो, मुसाले उस्लाई पनि त्यै डाइलग दियो, हात्ती पनि सँगै हिँड्यो ।
अलि अगाडि पुगेपछी सिंह व्हिस्की पिउदैथियो, मुसाले त्यसलाई पनि त्यै डाइलग दियो ।
सिंह उठ्यो अनि मुसालाई २ थप्पड लगाइदियो ।
हात्तिले सिंहलाई सोध्यो'किन हान्दैछौ यो बिचरा शान्त प्राणीलाई ?

What's the matter boy?

A policeman saw a little boy crying...

He approached him & asked: What's the matter boy?

pahilo prem patra

Mero pahilo prem patra yesto thiyo...
Dear ....... ,
ma talai ekdum mann parauxu... Taile pani class ma kasto herxes tesaile lagxa taile pani malai maya garxas.. Risaye pani risa nabole pani nabol tara please yo letter principle lai chai nadey hai? Feri ek period vari vale basauxa tyo gaidey le.... Sunn na taile ribbion ful style ma banera aauda kya ramri dekhinxa.. Ajhai dui chulti batera aauda ta gudiya jastai dekhinxa... thaha xa talai tero paxadi basne keti ta vanda naramri xe tesaile tesle teri ribbion ma sadhai masi lagaidinxe.. Tyo keti ko ghar mero ghar agadi ko ghar ho.. Tero ribbion ma masi lagako badla lina maile tesko ghar ko bell sadhai bajaudai vagdai garxu.. Ani sunn ali fair n lovely ra powder haru lagaune garr face ma ramri dekhinxes ani gori pani.. Tero side ma basne keti ta vanda pani

बच्‍चा भखर्र साईकल सिक्‍दैथियो

एउटा बच्‍चा भखर्र साईकल सिक्‍दैथियो ,
सिक्‍दै जाँदा खुट्‍टा छोडेर आमालाई देखाउदै : आमा !आमा मेरो खुट्‍टा छैन्‌ ( मतलब खुट्‍टा छोडेर चलाएको)

फेरी एक छिन पछि हात छोडेर: आमा !आमा मेरो हात छैन्‌।

५० प्रतिशत नेताहरु भष्टाचारी छैनन

एउटा पत्रीकाको सम्पादकले हिम्मत गरेर यो समाचार छापेछ
कि हाम्रो देशको ५० प्रतिशत नेताहरु भष्टाचारी छन । भोली पल्ट
देखी त्यो सम्पादकलाई फोनमा धम्की आउन थालेछ कि तैले
छापेको समाचार सच्याउने भए सच्या नत्र राम्रो हुने छैन भनेर ,

श्रीमती को Control

एक पटक एउटा देशका राजा लाई आफ्नो देश का विवाहीत पुरुष मध्ये को को आफ्नो श्रीमती को Control मा छ र कस्ले आफ्नो श्रीमती लाई Control मा राक्छ भनेर जान्न मन लागेछ। 

उन्ले सबै विवाहीत पुरुष हरुलाई २ वटा लाइन : पहिलो लाइन मा श्रीमती को गुलाम अनी दोस्रो लाइन मा श्रीमती लाई Control मा राख्ने लाई उभिनु भनेछ।

पहिलो लाइन मा हजारौं मान्छे रहेछन। 
दोस्रो लाइन मा १ जना मात्र रहेछ।

राजा उस्को नजिक गएर स्यबसी दिदै भनेछन। 
स्याबास मेरो देश मा एक जना मात्र मर्द रहेछ। 

mathematician sick of math

One day a mathematician decides that he is sick of math. 
So, he walks down to the fire department and announces that he wants to become a fireman.
The fire chief says, "Well, you look like a good guy. I'd be glad to hire you, but first I have to give you a little test."
The fire chief takes the mathematician to the alley behind the fire department which contains a dumpster, a spigot, and a hose. The chief then says, "OK, you're walking in the alley and you see the dumpster here is on fire. What do you do?"
The mathematician replies, "Well, I hook up the hose to the spigot, turn the water on, and put out the fire."
The chief says, "That's great... perfect. Now I have to ask you just one more question.
 What do you do if you're walking down the alley and you see the dumpster is not on fire?"

Two staisticains on PLANE

Two statisticians were travelling in an airplane from London to New York.
About an hour into the flight, the pilot announced that they had lost an engine, but don't worry, there are three left. However, instead of 5 hours it would take 7 hours to get to New York.
A little later, he announced that a second engine failed, and they still had two left, but it would take 10 hours to get to New York.

7 ways to catch a lion.

1. Newton’s Method:

Let, the lion catch you. For every action there is equal and opposite reaction. Implies you caught lion .

2. Einstein Method:

Run in the direction opposite to that of the lion. Due to higher relative velocity, the lion will also
run faster and will get tired soon. Now you can trap it easily.

3. Schrodinger Method:

At any given moment, there is a positive probability that lion to be in the cage. So set the trap, sit down and wait!

Santa at Final Examination

Santa reported for his university final examination, which consists of “Yes/No” type questions. 

He takes his seat in the examination hall, stares at the question paper for five minutes, and then in a fit of inspiration takes his purse out, removes a coin and starts tossing it, marking the answer sheet yes for heads and no for tails.

Within half an hour he is all done whereas the rest of the class is sweating it out. During the last few minutes, he is seen desperately flipping the coin, muttering and sweating.

The moderator, alarmed, approaches his and asks what is going on?

Weather Forecast

Once a Sardar was walking and had a glove on one hand and not on other so the man asked him why did he do so.

Sardarji experiment

Sardar was doing experiment with cockroach.

First he cut it’s one leg and told, “walk, walk”. Cockroach walked.

Then he cut it’s second leg and told the same. Cockroach walked.

Then cut the third leg and did the same.

At last he cut it’s fourth leg and ordered it walk! But cockroach didn’t walked.

Sardar ji on Air Travel

Once Sardar was going to Chandigarh from pune by a air-india plane.He was alloted the middle seat of one of the 3-seats array.

But as soon as the Sardarji got into the plane, he sat on the window side seat which was actually for an old lady.

After some time the old lady came and requested the Sardarji to leave the side seat.

But the Sardaji told, “I want to see the view from the window and shall not leave”.

The old lady then complained to the air hostess .The air hostess requested the Sardarji to leave that seat but Sardarji did not leave.

Then the air hostess went and told the asst. captain. He also came and requested, but in vain.

Finally the Captain came. He whispered something in the ears of the Sardarji and the Sardarji immedietly left the side seat and returned to the middle seat.

sardar happy at brain tumor

While having a brain check up…
Doctor : I regret to tell you that you have a brain tumor.
Sardar : Yesss!!! (jumps in joy)

Doctor : Did you understand what I just told you?
Sardar : Yes of course, do you think I’m dumb?
Doctor : Then why are you so happy?

dhamkiya mill rahi hai.

Customer: Mujhe phone per dhamkiya mill rahi hai.



Police: Kaun hai woh jo aapko dhamkiya de raha hai?

Santa and banta jungle mein

Santa and banta jungle mein, saamne aayaa sher…


Banta ne sher ki aakhon main matthi phenki, aur bhaagne lagaa aur santa ko bhi bhaagne ko kahaa.

Actually a microwave oven

Santa Singh goes into an electrical goods store, you know one of these stores that sells fridges, TVs etc.


Santa walks up to the salesman, points and says,

“I want to buy this TV.”

The salesman say, “Sorry, we do not sell anything to surds.”

So Santa goes away and comes back two hours later after having a haircut, points and says,

“I want to buy this TV.”

Shanta at Parking

Santa was busy in removing a wheel from auto!

Banta asks : Why are you removing a wheel from your auto?

Sardarji at Mirror Ship

Once a Sardarji goes to a mirror shop to buy a mirror.He wanders all over the shop before the shopkeeper comes and asks him,”May I help you?”.

Sardar: “I want a very strong mirror”.
Shop keeper: “Try this one sir!Its just Rs.1000/-”

Sardar: “Is it really that strong?”
Shop keeper: “Yes sir. If u want to know, you can throw this mirror from 100 storeyed building. This mirror does not breaks upto 99 floors sir!!”

depressed Santa Singh

Seeing Santa Singh depressed one of his friends asks him.

“Oye why are you sad?”

To which Santa replies …“I lost Rs 300 in bet.”

cricket

Three Sardars at picnic

Once three sardars decided to go on a picnic.

When they got there, they realized they had forgotten the soda.

So, the youngest sardar said he would go home and get the soda if the others promised not to eat the sandwiches until he got back.


An hour, a couple of hours, then all day went by.

2 engineer students

2 engineer students raat me
parhte huay…
1st: kitne baje hain?
2nd: 1 pathar utha kar samne k
ghar par mara….
1 aurat nikli r boli:

आमा मलाई AIDS लाग्यो

सेरेले आफ्नो आमालाई मुम्बई बाट फोन गरेछ ।
सेरे:- आमा मलाई AIDS लाग्यो !
आमा:- त्यसो भए त घर न आ उतै बश ।
सेरे:- किन र आमा के हुन्छ म घर आउदा ?
आमा :- यदि त घर आईस भने
१. तेरो स्वास्नीलाई एड्स लाग्छ
२.तेरो स्वास्नी बाट तेरो साथी धोतीलाई लाग्छ
३. धोती बाट हाम्री नोक्कर्नी लाई लाग्छ
४. नोक्कर्नी बाट तेरो बाउ लाई लाग्छ
५. तेरो बाउ बाट मलाई लाग्छ
६. मलाई लाग्यो भने पुरा गाँउलाई लाग्छ

9 महिना त भै सकेछ

धुर्मुसे को बिबाह भयेको 3 महिना पछि बच्चा भयो…
धुर्मुसे: यो 3 महिना मा नै कसरि बच्चा भयो?
सुंतलि: धुर्मु तिम्रो बिबाह भयेको कति भयो?
धुर्मुसे: 3 महिना
सुंतलि: अनि मेरो बिबाह भयेको?
धुर्मुशे: 3 महिना.
सुंतलि: अनि बच्चा कति महिना मा भयो? धुर्मुशे: 3 महिना पछि.
सुंतलि: जम्मा कति महिना भयो?

धुर्मुस नुहाएर टावेल बेरेर आयो

धुर्मुस नुहाएर टावेल बेरेर आयो अनि सुन्तली लाई

धुर्मुस :- सुन्तु सुन्तु हेर न मैले कती राम्रो पेन्टी लगाको छु

सुन्तली टावेल उठाउदै :- आबुई !! पेन्टी त लगाको छैनउ त ?

पोखरा घुम्न जाँदा

दुईजना गफाडिको गफ:
पहिलो : "हेर्न पोहोर साल मेरा काका पोखरा घुम्न जाँदा उहाँको घडि फेवा तालमा खसेर हराएको थियो तर हिजो भेटियो नि, अनि थाहा छ घडिले त ठिक टयम पनि दिई रहेको रहेछ ।"
दोस्रो : "त्यति मात्रै !! मेरा बा पोहोर फेवाताल घुम्दा घुम्दै डुँगाबाट खसेर हराएका थिए, तर हिजो त घरै आईपुगे नि त ।"
पहिलो : "(अचम्म मान्दै) हो र ?? अनि यत्रो १ वर्ष सम्म तेरा बा फेवाताल भित्र के गर्दै बसेछन्त ?"

पहिला त 'Cadbury' मै

पहिला त 'Cadbury' मै मान्थी,
अचेल 'Blackberry' पो भन्छे !

पहिला I-ce cream मै मान्थी,
अचेल Ii-PoD / i-PhonE पो भन्छे !

ग्यास्ट्रिक को गोलि खाने दाम समेत छैन गोजीमा,
उ त सामसुंग को "Galaxy Tablet" पो भन्छे !

आज त हदै गरि मोरीले,

मलाई कति माया गर्छौ?

रोमांटिक मुड मा !!!!
केटि: तिमि मलाई कति माया गर्छौ?

केटा: मेरो दिल मोबाईल हो तिमि तेस्को सिम कार्ड हौ..

केटि: भगवान म कति धेरै भग्यमानि छु..

केटa: THAnks GOD येस्लाई के थहा मेरो चाईनिज मोबाईल मा 5 वटा सिम कार्ड जान्छ भन्ने..

यकान्त ठाउम १ जना केटि र २ जना केटा

यकान्त ठाउम १ जना केटि र २ जना केटा बसेको पुलिस्ले समातेछ 
आनि सोधयछ १
लाइ भने६ तिमि याहा के गरेको भनेछ
बसुरि बजाको थिय आर्को लाई नि सोदेछ के
गरेको थियो भनेर उस्ले नि भनिछ मैले
नि बसुरि बजाई राहको थिय आनि केटिलाई

गाऊमा पुलिशहरु आएका

छोरी : आमा आज गाऊमा पुलिशहरु आएका छन ।
आमा : ओहो यिनि पुलिसहरु केटि देख्नेबित्तिकै
नियत खराब हुन्छ , छोरि तँ भित्र आईज त !
छोरी : हैन आमा पुलिशसँग हाम्रो देशका महान
...नेताहरु रामचन्द्र पौडेल ,झलनाथ खनाल ,
प्रचन्ड जि पनि हूनूहून्छ चिन्ता गर्नू पदैन !

भिख माग्दा कसैले कार दियो भने

पहिलो भिखारी: 


तिमिले कसैसगँ भिख माग्दा कसैले कार दियो भने तिमि के
गर्छो ?
दोस्रो भिखारि:
 म कारमा बसेर भिख माग्न जान्छुँ।

परिक्षा नजिक आईसक्यो

शिक्षक :
 तिमीहरुको परिक्षा नजिक आईसक्यो , अब कसैको मनमा कुनै प्रश्न छ भने सोधे हुन्छ ।
माधव नेपालको छोरा :

तिमी पागल कसरी भयौ

Doctor:तिमी पागल कसरी भयौ?
.
Pagal: मैले एक विधुवासँग विवाह गरे उसको जवान
छोरीसँग
मेरो बाउले विहे गरयो .
यसरी मेरो छोरी मेरो आमा भई
उनिहरुको घरमा फेरि छोरी जन्म्यो त्यो मेरो बहिनी भई
... तर म उसको हजुरआमाको लोग्ने थिए यसरी उ
मेरो नातिनि पो भई यसरी मेरो छोरो बहिनिलाई
पनि हजुरआमा भन्नुपरयो अनि म