May 31, 2013
April 2, 2013
I told him I charge $100 a night.
Boss hired a sexy secretary & got infatuated.
10 days later he committed suicide by jumping from
his 54th floor office.
Police:
'Who was there at that time in the room?'
Secy:
'I was there.
He was a good man.
One day he bought me:
a fur coat for $5000,
then he bought me a diamond necklace for $50000, then he bought me a diamond ring for $10000.
Today he asked me to spend the night at his place.
I told him I charge $100 a night.
10 days later he committed suicide by jumping from
his 54th floor office.
Police:
'Who was there at that time in the room?'
Secy:
'I was there.
He was a good man.
One day he bought me:
a fur coat for $5000,
then he bought me a diamond necklace for $50000, then he bought me a diamond ring for $10000.
Today he asked me to spend the night at his place.
I told him I charge $100 a night.
10 inch will be good enough
A lady made an advertisment in newspaper,-
"I want a man to be my partner..
Conditions 3..
1. He will not beat me,
2. He will not run away.
3 and most important.- He will have to satistfy
me in beds,whenever i want.
10 inch will be good enough"
After some hour her door bell rang.
"I want a man to be my partner..
Conditions 3..
1. He will not beat me,
2. He will not run away.
3 and most important.- He will have to satistfy
me in beds,whenever i want.
10 inch will be good enough"
After some hour her door bell rang.
I am sending 100 kisses
- A Husband working in UK wrote to his wife in
Srilanka
Dear Sunita Darling,
I can't send you my salary this month because the
global market crisis has affected my Company's
performance, so I am sending 100 kisses.
You are my sweetheart, please understand and
adjust with this situation.
Your loving husband,
His wife replied===============
Hey hubby
Thanks for the 100 kisses.
Below is the list of expenses I paid with the Kisses
1. The Milk man agreed on 2 kisses for one
month's milk.
2. The electricity man, agreed not to disconnect
only after 7 kisses.
3. Your landlord comes every day to take 2 or 3
kisses instead of the monthly rent.
4. Supermarket owner did not accept kisses
Srilanka
Dear Sunita Darling,
I can't send you my salary this month because the
global market crisis has affected my Company's
performance, so I am sending 100 kisses.
You are my sweetheart, please understand and
adjust with this situation.
Your loving husband,
His wife replied===============
Hey hubby
Thanks for the 100 kisses.
Below is the list of expenses I paid with the Kisses
1. The Milk man agreed on 2 kisses for one
month's milk.
2. The electricity man, agreed not to disconnect
only after 7 kisses.
3. Your landlord comes every day to take 2 or 3
kisses instead of the monthly rent.
4. Supermarket owner did not accept kisses
psychiatrist was conducting a group therapy
A psychiatrist was conducting a group therapy
session with four young
mothers and their small children. "You all have
obsessions," he
observed.
To the first mother, he said, "You are obsessed
with eating. You've
even named your daughter Candy."
He turned to the second Mom. "Your obsession is
money. Again, it
manifests itself in your child's name, Penny,"
He turned to the third Mom. "Your obsession is
session with four young
mothers and their small children. "You all have
obsessions," he
observed.
To the first mother, he said, "You are obsessed
with eating. You've
even named your daughter Candy."
He turned to the second Mom. "Your obsession is
money. Again, it
manifests itself in your child's name, Penny,"
He turned to the third Mom. "Your obsession is
drunk man arrives late at home
A drunk man arrives late at home.....
.
.
He knows his wife won't open the
door,
.
so he decides to pretend that he
bought her flowers
.
and knocks the door... .
.
.
He knows his wife won't open the
door,
.
so he decides to pretend that he
bought her flowers
.
and knocks the door... .
Extreme Chalak Bachha
Extreme Chalak Bachha!
Son: baba tapailo Love Marriage vayeko thiyo
ho??
Dad: Ho but taile kasari taha pais?
Son: baba tapailo Love Marriage vayeko thiyo
ho??
Dad: Ho but taile kasari taha pais?
man 80 years of age married a young lady
A man 80 years of age married a young lady.
A year later he carried her to the hospital, and
she had a baby. The nurse said to the man:
‘At your age, how do you do that?’
The man answered: ‘You just have to keep the
motor running’.
Another year passes, and the man carries her
back to the hospital, another baby. The same
nurse said to the man and asked: ‘You are
A year later he carried her to the hospital, and
she had a baby. The nurse said to the man:
‘At your age, how do you do that?’
The man answered: ‘You just have to keep the
motor running’.
Another year passes, and the man carries her
back to the hospital, another baby. The same
nurse said to the man and asked: ‘You are
March 29, 2013
गर्लफ्रेन्डका का कुरा!
गर्लफ्रेन्डका का कुरा!
===========
1. याद गरेर मिस्कल
गर्यो लोभी भन्छे।
2. माया लागेर फोन गर्यो,"किन
फोन गरेको काम नपाएर भन्छे"।
3. फोन गरेध
भने,"तिमी पहिलेजस्तो रहेनौ,
हामीजस्तासँग कँहा बोल्न हुन्छर"
भन्छे।
4.पहिले जस्तै गरी कुरा गर्यो,"
तिमी त कस्तो बोरिङ्ग,
तिमीलाइ मसँग बोल्न मन रहेनछ"
भन्छे।
===========
1. याद गरेर मिस्कल
गर्यो लोभी भन्छे।
2. माया लागेर फोन गर्यो,"किन
फोन गरेको काम नपाएर भन्छे"।
3. फोन गरेध
भने,"तिमी पहिलेजस्तो रहेनौ,
हामीजस्तासँग कँहा बोल्न हुन्छर"
भन्छे।
4.पहिले जस्तै गरी कुरा गर्यो,"
तिमी त कस्तो बोरिङ्ग,
तिमीलाइ मसँग बोल्न मन रहेनछ"
भन्छे।
शेरे हात हेराउन भनेर पण्डित को मा गएछ ।
शेरे हात हेराउन भनेर पण्डित को मा गएछ ।
शेरे : पण्डित बाजे के यो साचो हो की,
अहिले जुन सिरमती सँग बस्यो,
अर्को जन्ममा पनि तेही सिरमती सँग
बस्नुपरछ ?
पण्डित : हो नी त ।
शेरे : तेसोभए आत्महत्या गरेपनी
फरक परदोरहेनछ । :D
शेरे : पण्डित बाजे के यो साचो हो की,
अहिले जुन सिरमती सँग बस्यो,
अर्को जन्ममा पनि तेही सिरमती सँग
बस्नुपरछ ?
पण्डित : हो नी त ।
शेरे : तेसोभए आत्महत्या गरेपनी
फरक परदोरहेनछ । :D
Chemical symbol of Barium
Chemistry class….
Professor:Chemical symbol of Barium?
Bindash Charlie: BA
Professor:For sodium?
Bindash Charlie: NA
Professor:Chemical symbol of Barium?
Bindash Charlie: BA
Professor:For sodium?
Bindash Charlie: NA
Haku Job Interview
Haku एउटा जागिर खान परो भनेर, एक
कम्पनीमा Interview दिनलाई गएछ…
Boss: Well! What’s your name?
Haku : My name is Haku
Boss: Ok, let me check your word
power
Haku : Yes sir !
Boss: Tell me the opposite of “Good”
Haku : Bad
Boss: Come
Haku : Go
Boss: Fast
Haku : Slow !!
Boss: Ugly
Haku : Hochi (होची)
Boss: HOCHIIIIIII ?????????
Haku : अग्ली
Boss: Shut up!
Haku : Keep talking
Boss: Ok now stop all this!
Haku : Ok now start all this!
Boss: अरे यार !!!!!!!
Haku : अरे दुश्मन !!!!!!!!!!
Boss: साला चुप लाग
Haku : साली बोलिराख
Boss: Oh God !!!
Haku : Oh Devil
Boss: Get out …….!!!!!
कम्पनीमा Interview दिनलाई गएछ…
Boss: Well! What’s your name?
Haku : My name is Haku
Boss: Ok, let me check your word
power
Haku : Yes sir !
Boss: Tell me the opposite of “Good”
Haku : Bad
Boss: Come
Haku : Go
Boss: Fast
Haku : Slow !!
Boss: Ugly
Haku : Hochi (होची)
Boss: HOCHIIIIIII ?????????
Haku : अग्ली
Boss: Shut up!
Haku : Keep talking
Boss: Ok now stop all this!
Haku : Ok now start all this!
Boss: अरे यार !!!!!!!
Haku : अरे दुश्मन !!!!!!!!!!
Boss: साला चुप लाग
Haku : साली बोलिराख
Boss: Oh God !!!
Haku : Oh Devil
Boss: Get out …….!!!!!
Atif Aslam Ki LOve Story
Atif Aslam Ki LOve Story:-
Girl:"Who are you.. ??
.
Atif:"Mein Ek dard hu ya Ek Ehsaas hu..
.
Girl:"Tum Mera Picha kyu karte ho.. ??
.
Atif:"Bekhuda tumhi ho, har Jagah tumhi ho..
Girl:"Who are you.. ??
.
Atif:"Mein Ek dard hu ya Ek Ehsaas hu..
.
Girl:"Tum Mera Picha kyu karte ho.. ??
.
Atif:"Bekhuda tumhi ho, har Jagah tumhi ho..
WHAT, WHY,WHEN were talking eachother
3 GUYS, named WHAT, WHY,WHEN
were talking!
.
.
WHAT- WHY what ru doing??
WHY- I donno wat i’m doing..
WHAT- WHY?
WHY- Why ru calling me What?
WHAT- Now Why did u call me?
WHY- What? When did I call u??
WHEN- In ur problem Y ru calling me??
WHY- What? Did I call u? When?
WHAT & WHEN- What?
were talking!
.
.
WHAT- WHY what ru doing??
WHY- I donno wat i’m doing..
WHAT- WHY?
WHY- Why ru calling me What?
WHAT- Now Why did u call me?
WHY- What? When did I call u??
WHEN- In ur problem Y ru calling me??
WHY- What? Did I call u? When?
WHAT & WHEN- What?
एकदिन महादेब रिसाएछन
एकदिन महादेब
काठमाण्डुमा बुद्धको मात्र
मुर्ती धेरै
देखेर अति नै रिसाएछन र
बुद्धलाई भेटेर भनेछन
.
महादेब :- हेल्लो बुद्ध
सोल्टी, म
देवताको पनि देवता.... तर
मेरो भन्दा तिम्रो धेरै
मुर्ती रहेछ
यो काठमाण्डुमा,
तिम्रो भक्तहरुलाई भनेर
मेरो धेरै मुर्ती बनाउन
काठमाण्डुमा बुद्धको मात्र
मुर्ती धेरै
देखेर अति नै रिसाएछन र
बुद्धलाई भेटेर भनेछन
.
महादेब :- हेल्लो बुद्ध
सोल्टी, म
देवताको पनि देवता.... तर
मेरो भन्दा तिम्रो धेरै
मुर्ती रहेछ
यो काठमाण्डुमा,
तिम्रो भक्तहरुलाई भनेर
मेरो धेरै मुर्ती बनाउन
शेरे आफ्नो कुखुरी मरेकोले गर्दा
शेरे आफ्नो कुखुरी मरेकोले गर्दा रुदै रहेछ
। अनि हर्केले आएर सोधेछः
हर्के :- तँ किन रोएको शेरे ???
शेरे :- मेरो कुखुरी मरी हुँ हुँ हुँ हुँ
हर्के :- जाबो कुखुरी मर्दैमा रुनु पर्छ,
म आफ्नो बाउ मर्दा त रोइनँ ।
। अनि हर्केले आएर सोधेछः
हर्के :- तँ किन रोएको शेरे ???
शेरे :- मेरो कुखुरी मरी हुँ हुँ हुँ हुँ
हर्के :- जाबो कुखुरी मर्दैमा रुनु पर्छ,
म आफ्नो बाउ मर्दा त रोइनँ ।
Mum you lied to me
Johnny : Mum you lied to me.
Mum : How ?
Johnny : You said my brother is a little
Angel
Mum : Yes he is!
Mum : How ?
Johnny : You said my brother is a little
Angel
Mum : Yes he is!
मिस हजुर अकबरकॊ ओछ्यान मा
एक दिन स्कुलमा मिस ले बच्चाहरुलाई
कथा सुनाउदै भनिन्।
मिस- एकदिन अकबर राजा आफ्नॊ ओछ्यानमा
(बिचैमा एउटा बच्ची बॊलिन मिस यॊ मदनले पछाडी बाट मलाई चिमॊट्छ )
मिस- मदन तिमी नचली बस नत्र मैले
कथा सुनाउदै भनिन्।
मिस- एकदिन अकबर राजा आफ्नॊ ओछ्यानमा
(बिचैमा एउटा बच्ची बॊलिन मिस यॊ मदनले पछाडी बाट मलाई चिमॊट्छ )
मिस- मदन तिमी नचली बस नत्र मैले
प्रचन्डको दिमाग जोखे मात्र
प्रचन्डको दिमाग जोखे मात्र एक पाउ छ
बाबुरामको बुद्दी भित्र मुलुक बेच्ने दाउ छ ।।
शुसिलदाको त दारी सेतो मन रै छ कालो
झलनाथ त झल्लु भैगो खान्छ पालै पालो ।।
माधव बाजे टपरे हुन ओली जि त कुमाइ
रेग्मीले खान्छ अब यिनलाई घुमाइ घुमाइ ।।
मदेस बादी दलाल रै छन नागरिकता बेच्ने
बाबुरामको बुद्दी भित्र मुलुक बेच्ने दाउ छ ।।
शुसिलदाको त दारी सेतो मन रै छ कालो
झलनाथ त झल्लु भैगो खान्छ पालै पालो ।।
माधव बाजे टपरे हुन ओली जि त कुमाइ
रेग्मीले खान्छ अब यिनलाई घुमाइ घुमाइ ।।
मदेस बादी दलाल रै छन नागरिकता बेच्ने
Why Do We Students Sleep For Long Hours
"Why Do We Students Sleep For Long
Hours..??"
.
.
.
Awesome Answer By Students :
.
.
Hours..??"
.
.
.
Awesome Answer By Students :
.
.
Aaja Baata Hamro Relation Khattam
Girl: Aaja Baata Hamro Relation Khattam !
Hami Ek-arkako Sappai Gift Firta Garau la?!
Boy:Thikai xa,
RECHARGE Card bata Suru Garum na ta !!
.
.
.
.
.
.
Hami Ek-arkako Sappai Gift Firta Garau la?!
Boy:Thikai xa,
RECHARGE Card bata Suru Garum na ta !!
.
.
.
.
.
.
शेरेले आफ्नो छोरोको कोटको खल्तिबाट
शेरेले आफ्नो छोरोको कोटको खल्तिबाट चुरोट्,
सुर्ति, पुकार्, रेखा थापाको फोटो र
केटीहरुको नम्मर भेटेछ र बेस्सरी चुटेछ र भनेछ्:
यस्तो नराम्रो काम कहिले देखी सुरु गरिस ?
सुर्ति, पुकार्, रेखा थापाको फोटो र
केटीहरुको नम्मर भेटेछ र बेस्सरी चुटेछ र भनेछ्:
यस्तो नराम्रो काम कहिले देखी सुरु गरिस ?
ड्राइभरको लवलेटर:
ड्राइभरको लवलेटर:
-------------------------
मेरो मुटुकी स्टेयरिङ् , चौथो गियर भन्दा धेरै
माया ! अहिले सम्म म कण्डिसनमा नै छु, आषा छ,
तिमी पनि पञ्चर भएकी छैनौ होला । म घरबाट
हिँड्दा तिम्रो चक्का मेरो मतलब खुट्टा ठिक
थिएन, राम्रो वर्कसपमा गएर डाक्टरलाई
देखाउनु । केटाकेटीलाई गाली गर्दा हर्न सानो पार्नु ,
-------------------------
मेरो मुटुकी स्टेयरिङ् , चौथो गियर भन्दा धेरै
माया ! अहिले सम्म म कण्डिसनमा नै छु, आषा छ,
तिमी पनि पञ्चर भएकी छैनौ होला । म घरबाट
हिँड्दा तिम्रो चक्का मेरो मतलब खुट्टा ठिक
थिएन, राम्रो वर्कसपमा गएर डाक्टरलाई
देखाउनु । केटाकेटीलाई गाली गर्दा हर्न सानो पार्नु ,
February 3, 2013
छोरा हरूलाई भविष्यमा के बनाउने
शेरे: हैन हो माङ्ने काका
तपाईको यो 3 छोरा हरूलाई
भविष्यमा के बनाउने लक्ष्य
छ...?
.
.
माङ्ने बुढो: अब हेर
शेरबहदुर भतीज जेठो छोरो
एक्दमै काम चोर छ, यस्लाई
सरकारी कर्मचारी बनाउने,
तपाईको यो 3 छोरा हरूलाई
भविष्यमा के बनाउने लक्ष्य
छ...?
.
.
माङ्ने बुढो: अब हेर
शेरबहदुर भतीज जेठो छोरो
एक्दमै काम चोर छ, यस्लाई
सरकारी कर्मचारी बनाउने,
रेखा थापाको नम्बर दिनु
किराना पसल मा गई गाह्रक: हजुर यहाँ के के पाइन्छ होला ??
पसले आफ्नै धुनमा हुन्छ....
गाह्रक:(पसलेले न सुनेपछि।।अलि ठुलो ठुलो स्वरमा...) हजुर यहाँ के के पाइन्छ होला ??
पसले ..झर्कदै: सबैथोक पाइन्छ के चाहियो..
गाह्रक: उसो भए रेखा थापाको नम्बर दिनुन ।
पसले आफ्नै धुनमा हुन्छ....
गाह्रक:(पसलेले न सुनेपछि।।अलि ठुलो ठुलो स्वरमा...) हजुर यहाँ के के पाइन्छ होला ??
पसले ..झर्कदै: सबैथोक पाइन्छ के चाहियो..
गाह्रक: उसो भए रेखा थापाको नम्बर दिनुन ।
January 26, 2013
धोती राती चुरोट खान मन
एउटा धोती राती चुरोट खान मन लागेछ...
चुरोट गोजी मै रैछ झिकेर मुखमा राखेछ,
अनी सलाई खोजेछ पाएनछ,
.
लाइटर खोजेछ त्यो पानी पाएनछ,
कोठाको सबै ठाउँमा हेरेछ तर भेटेनछ,
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